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Be careful who you tell.

Recently, a 70-year-old woman came to see me to discuss a facelift procedure. She was still very young at heart but when she looked in the mirror, the person looking back at her, didn’t seem to match how she felt inside.

She and her husband knew my parents well and I had in fact operated on her 20 years previously. After listening carefully to her desired outcome, I felt a face/neck-lift would indeed give her the result she was after.

She was keen to proceed, put down her deposit and 2 weeks prior to the operation, completed her payment in full.

On Mother’s Day (a week before her operation) she attended a family function in her honour. She proudly announced her intention to her children. She did not receive the endorsement she was expecting with one family member writing an emotionally charged email to her the following day, outlining why her decision would have a lasting negative impact on her children and grandchildren.

My patient was so troubled by this along with the threatened alteration to the family dynamic, that she chose to cancel her operative procedure.

It takes a lot of courage to attend a plastic surgeon in the first place. Commonly the issue has been at the forefront of a person’s mind for years. The issue might not even be apparent to loved ones who love us as we are, with no need to change.

Cosmetic surgery is often a last resort when all the creams, Botox, fillers, diet, hours in the gym are no longer working. It is a decision often made after countless hours of soul searching and it is a decision that a person makes for themselves. Time and time again I hear my patients say, “I am doing this for myself; not for anybody else.”

Our loved ones are often well-meaning by they just don’t get it. So, if you have decided to have a cosmetic procedure and are excited when you think of what this will give you, be very careful whom you share this with. Sometimes keeping your own counsel, gives you the greatest rewards.

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